on unsettling parts of scripture

Our reaction to many things is often an indication of our personalities. How does one react to criticism? To riches? To adoration? To challenges? To conflict? To Christ’s forgiveness?

How about to the Bible? Over the years I have found these to be the most unsettling parts of Scripture:

– Balaam being in apparent communion with God yet still dying outside his grace
– The lying spirit sent by God in Micaiah’s story (1 Kings 22:19-23)
– Jesus’ condemnation of the evildoers who thought they were in fact righteous men (Matt 7:23)
– Uzzah struck down dead by the Lord after touching the ark
– Saul’s apparent closeness with the Lord, yet still dying outside his grace
– The Israelites’ destruction (some say ethnic cleansing and genocide) of the Amorites and other Canaanite peoples, on God’s orders
– The fate of the man of God (1 Kings 13), deceived into disobeying God and dying outside his grace

So added together what do I find? Nearly all these verses share a common theme of apparent closeness to God to be met with ultimate separation from God.

I fear separation from God. Moreover I fear as a professed follower of Jesus that I am not actually in his grace.