I’d been speaking to an old friend of mine going through a very difficult pregnancy. The type that might not bode well for the future. Two or more hours of pouring out heart and soul, bitter bile, despair, anxiety, doubt. Some words traded about God’s providence. But we both meant it thin as ice, and we knew it.
Continue reading “on a very un-Christian thought”Dear Little Feather,
You’ll be getting busy very soon. At some points you’ll feel that it’s far too much for you to handle. Maybe you won’t just feel tired, you’ll start to think ahead and try to see a way for the pressure to stop, and maybe you won’t be able to picture it.
When that moment comes, you might feel angry, or bitter. You might wonder why the older you get, the less you’re treated like someone who is loved, and more like someone that has to perform and work hard – or else. Like a resource to be harvested, or like fuel for some awful machine that runs on everyone’s misery.
Continue reading “Dear Little Feather,”on giant killing
“When the words that David spoke were heard, they repeated them before Saul, and he sent for him. And David said to Saul, “Let no man’s heart fail because of him. Your servant will go and fight with this Philistine.” And Saul said to David, “You are not able to go against this Philistine to fight with him, for you are but a youth, and he has been a man of war from his youth.” But David said to Saul, “Your servant used to keep sheep for his father. And when there came a lion, or a bear, and took a lamb from the flock, I went after him and struck him and delivered it out of his mouth. And if he arose against me, I caught him by his beard and struck him and killed him. Your servant has struck down both lions and bears, and this uncircumcised Philistine shall be like one of them, for he has defied the armies of the living God.” And David said, “The LORD who delivered me from the paw of the lion and from the paw of the bear will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine.” And Saul said to David, “Go, and the LORD be with you!” Then Saul clothed David with his armor. He put a helmet of bronze on his head and clothed him with a coat of mail, and David strapped his sword over his armor. And he tried in vain to go, for he had not tested them. Then David said to Saul, “I cannot go with these, for I have not tested them.” So David put them off. Then he took his staff in his hand and chose five smooth stones from the brook and put them in his shepherd’s pouch. His sling was in his hand, and he approached the Philistine.”
1 Samuel 17:31-40
What a great story. How amazing that teeny, tiny David could defeat the giant Goliath! What kind of giants are there in your life? Maybe relationships that have gone bad? Maybe the fear that you’re not good enough? Maybe pressure from your studies? But all it takes is some faith. Even if you’re small and weak, even if it seems like you can’t make it, all you need is to have enough faith, and go out there and slay those giants, and God will give you the victory!
What I just told you was a very common way of talking about this Bible story when I was growing up. It sounds really encouraging, right? You can do anything you can imagine, even something as impossible as a little boy killing a giant, if you have enough faith.
But that always bothered me — have faith. What does it mean? Have faith in what? In myself? In God? What’s the hope? That God will help me just because I think he will? That I can get what I want because I wish hard enough?
Continue reading “on giant killing”on Jesus’s kingship and its complications
“Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. And after fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. And the tempter came and said to him, “If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become loaves of bread.”
But he answered, “It is written, “‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.’”
Then the devil took him to the holy city and set him on the pinnacle of the temple and said to him, “If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down, for it is written, “‘He will command his angels concerning you,’ and “‘On their hands they will bear you up, lest you strike your foot against a stone.’”
Jesus said to him, “Again it is written, ‘You shall not put the Lord your God to the test.’”
Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory. And he said to him, “All these I will give you, if you will fall down and worship me.”
Then Jesus said to him, “Be gone, Satan! For it is written, “‘You shall worship the Lord your God and him only shall you serve.’”
Then the devil left him, and behold, angels came and were ministering to him.”
Matthew 4:1-11
We like our ideas to be simple, don’t we? Black and white is easier than shades of grey. We like the news to be about good guys vs bad guys, not bad guys vs worse guys. We like our Instagram Stories to be mostly pictures, not text. And then there’s that design principle called KISS – Keep It Simple, Stupid.
But the problem is most things aren’t actually simple. People aren’t simple. And sometimes packaging complicated things to look simple is not truthful or helpful. Christians often like to do this — the Bible is all about this, or being a Christian means doing that. We like to talk about a Jesus who’s nice and cuddly, always ready to forgive, a nice teacher, meek and mild, basically Santa Claus but skinny and not just available during Christmas.
Continue reading “on Jesus’s kingship and its complications”on Psalm 23
“The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.”
—Psalm 23
I think I first heard this psalm when I was a kid in Sunday school. Which makes sense — it’s full of soothing, nice things, there’s kindly shepherds and fluffy sheep, and green grass and peaceful lakes.
Nowadays I usually hear this psalm at funerals. And often it just seemed like a mismatch to me, talking about grass and lakes when someone has just passed away. If I knew the deceased person well, it was almost like a cruel joke. Can kind, soothing words bring someone back to life? In the face of death, is this all we have — nice words and fluffy sheep and overflowing cups?
Continue reading “on Psalm 23”on signs and laws
Seeing the crowds, he went up on the mountain, and when he sat down, his disciples came to him.
And he opened his mouth and taught them, saying:
“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.
“Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.
“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.
“Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
“Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.”
Matthew 5:1-12
If we’re super honest, sometimes it feels like God is a little inconsistent with his miracles. Almost like he had a quota of miracles to perform, and it seems like he used them all up during Bible times, and he’s basically run dry nowadays. Why can’t God part traffic like he parted the Red Sea? Why can’t God multiply red marks like he did with the loaves and fish?
Why can’t he heal me with a word?
Continue reading “on signs and laws”this is my King
This is my King. He doesn’t wear a suit of shining armour. He doesn’t wear a fine business suit. He doesn’t have nice hair, or a secretary. He doesn’t have a PhD, or a career in politics. He is the Son of God, but that doesn’t stop him from coming to find people who are lost. He is the Commander of all the armies of Heaven, but that doesn’t stop him from trying to talk to people who hate him.
Continue reading “this is my King”on feeling aggrieved
I’ve been feeling aggrieved lately.
Years serving under the colours as it were and now that I’ve left abruptly, I have little to show for it: depleted finances, a dragging degree I’ve long since lost interest in, a handful of wistful photos, and a winding, misty path ahead.
I feel like I’m owed something for all I’ve done. Why haven’t You rewarded me commensurately? Aren’t You the great provider?
And all of a sudden I’m a victim of injustice. Society, church, school, and God have not delivered as I have delivered. Where is my reward? Continue reading “on feeling aggrieved”
on the centrality of Jesus
“So get rid of all evil behavior. Be done with all deceit, hypocrisy, jealousy, and all unkind speech. Like newborn babies, you must crave pure spiritual milk so that you will grow into a full experience of salvation. Cry out for this nourishment, now that you have had a taste of the Lord’s kindness.
You are coming to Christ, who is the living cornerstone of God’s temple. He was rejected by people, but he was chosen by God for great honor. And you are living stones that God is building into his spiritual temple. What’s more, you are his holy priests. Through the mediation of Jesus Christ, you offer spiritual sacrifices that please God. As the Scriptures say, “I am placing a cornerstone in Jerusalem, chosen for great honor, and anyone who trusts in him will never be disgraced.”
Yes, you who trust him recognize the honor God has given him. But for those who reject him, “The stone that the builders rejected has now become the cornerstone.”
And, “He is the stone that makes people stumble, the rock that makes them fall.”
They stumble because they do not obey God’s word, and so they meet the fate that was planned for them. But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light. “Once you had no identity as a people; now you are God’s people. Once you received no mercy; now you have received God’s mercy.” — 1 Peter 2:1-10
“Rid yourselves, then, of all evil; no more lying or hypocrisy or jealousy or insulting language. Be like newborn babies, always thirsty for the pure spiritual milk, so that by drinking it you may grow up and be saved.” I know these words don’t seem very inspiring. They’re probably not what you want to hear first thing in the morning, on your first day back to school. Continue reading “on the centrality of Jesus”
on the naturalness of death
Growing up in the 90s first in Canada, then in a westernised bubble in Hong Kong, I heard this idea a lot: death is natural, it’s just another stage of life. It sounds sage, it sounds nice, and reliable people say it – Mama Gump and Mufasa among others.
I heard it again tonight at a funeral service for a family friend. ‘We know that death is just another part of life,’ the priest told us. It’s ok, please feel better.
My buddy didn’t. The deceased was his uncle. He looked down at his feet as he told me ‘He got baptised before I was even born. I’ve never heard him talk about church even once. What am I supposed to feel about this?’ Continue reading “on the naturalness of death”
Remember, My Lord 